(Taken from an inspirational turn during a recent trip amid the jungles at Corbett National Park).
Hey everyone! With the big 3-0 nearer on my watch then everything else, have been working on ways to take stock of who I am and what I intend to you with the beautiful journey called life. Can’t imagine that have spent 3 decades already on mundane tracks, apart from the usual (Education, Career, Shaadi and Bacha) and would rather work on ways to be accounting for well-spent than spent…
Before I begin, here’s a brief overtone on who I am and what I do:
I am a career woman / homemaker (running between both roads), who isn’t very keen on spending her days through chores (I would rather turn towards meaningful observations and conversations). The hills and vast greens are my calling, whenever the noise factor turns a little higher than required and I share the same track with my life mate.
It is here that I recalibrate on a bi-monthly basis and auto sort on what is important and what’s not. A recent trip through Ram Nagar (beyond Muradabad), which brought us to Corbett National Park, unintentionally helped me lock down on 10 things I believe one should be able to do, before they turn 30. So, I brought the list back and now am sharing it here:
Freshen up with films to watch, even if you’re alone:
The idea is not just about watching films alone… good thing if you have company anyhow. It’s about setting aside 100-120 odd minutes to self, to catch something which I wish to do, reflect on it and see how it can connect to my life. Films and books are more of my things, hence have chosen these.
In fact, in no particular order, have worked out a list for the coming summer that’s partially inspirational, partially hilarious, partially films I wanted to see but couldn’t and even the odd potboiler for equal measure.
Films so far – Gulabi Gang, Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Angry Indian Goddesses, Carrie (the 2013 version), Wazir, Bajirao Mastani
Films on the anvil – Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind, The Breakfast Club, Schindler’s List, Into The Wild, The Perks of Being A Wallflower, Masan, Aligarh, The Room, Persona, Black Swan, Persona, Shame, We Need to Talk About Kevin, Repulsion, Where the Wild Things Are, Revanant.
Give time and priority to your family – Everyday.
Money, career or time for home? For the last four years, rolling between these priorities has been what has kept me up (occasionally – can’t stay awake past 12 😦 ) or mentally occupied. Especially since the little one came into the picture.
And this is what I figured — no offense to those who say they have only a short span to make a mark for themselves; but office rewards are not warm hugs or genuine smiles. They do bring in the cash (which is important), but not enough to look my girl in the eye and say ‘I am too busy to spend time with you’.
Invest some time for charity
Not money – time. Consider the basics:
We come from a generation, where spending on a pair of shoes to fine jewellery costs us no more than a click in time and barely a minute of thought in disposable income. Time is a dearer commodity and possible options for me including teaching or volunteering over the weekend. Still trying to figure out the basics in this direction that would lead to a worthwhile commitment and not a one-off trend.
Hone a passion
Life can be a song well sung, provided you have also worked out your tunes, proverbially. Go dig deep into the cupboard of your school pastimes and look for what made you click or what you were inspired towards.
For me it was either sketching, drums, dance or this. And now that the pen has come back into the picture, maybe the pencil, tunes and sticks would too.
Find your own style statement
Style is an enduring tangent in our lives; it’s the beat to which we set our days; our feel good factor on good days as well as a security blanket on the not-so-great ones. It is not dependent on what fashion gurus or trend reports have to stay; rather it’s who we are.
A piece by Dave Kerpen, Founder & CEO of Likeable Local and fellow social marketer on LinkedIn likens a signature style (neon orange shoes) to a networking tool in his blog post.
For me these covers have been androgen in nature: a black waistcoat, a thick metallic belt, brogues on one end and an element of quirk / mismatch on the other: quirky jewellery, heavy curls and high-heeled, laced shoes.
Start a savings fund
Finances are complex for me and even as I try balancing my day to days with a long-term course, there are times when I find myself in trying situations. Choosing to be a child at heart does not bode well financially.
Then what should one do? I found a good go-to resource here, though still trying hard to achieve it fully.
Think of a goal in life, something bigger than yourself
Get up, go through chores, get to work, run back, do chores and sleep – that’s been the crux of my days through and through. And even though I know, I would rather be involved in something bigger, that’s been a routine.
How do you find that something bigger — the bit which would actual meaning to your life? Is it a successful career, a happy home, financial heights, fulfilling your obligations or making yourself count?
I think I have found my answer.. now just working towards it in a slow manner.
While everyone is fascinated by these travel phases, I prefer covering the distance. Walking it (literally and in a deeper tone), is where I find my drive and comfort and let me choose my pace as I deal with my mental clutter.
Physically, it’s a fitness tonic worth a bite: it’s doable, does not require high-profile gear, a direction, special measures or a destination or a specific location. You can wade through cityscapes, hike up mountains or roam on roads to your heart’s content. And it brings with it several clarifying thoughts.
Smile, acknowledge – move on
There are moments when you things won’t work. When you would be on the receiving end and people will talk about how this could be done or that could be done better. Yes, it could — but crying over that is not going to help you get to wherever you’re heading in life.
So, what do you do? Call SAM.
Smile through it all – Things may get better, they may not. Your positive attitude is an inclination of how you’re dealing through it.
Acknowledge – Sinking in a hole and pretending the situation will go away are not long-term solution; hell that isn’t even a temporary one. Acknowledging what is happening and addressing it accordingly is a better idea, anyday. So opt for it.
Move on – Situations will come and go. People will come and go. You should move on too – consider whether what’s happening is really stressful and what could be a solution to it. And then opt for it; if that’s not possible – acknowledge that you’ve done all possible and then leave it to a higher power.
Everything happens for a reason – even step is a move forward and every interaction a lesson. Show gratitude for it all, when needed and move on, when it’s not required.
Who you are, what you have become and how you take it forward is all because of how you deal with situations; others are merely stimuli who help you in a specific direction. Thank them for it.
Till next time, stay blessed!